Growing up as a girl in a small town middle of nowhere America raised Christian (of course), sex was practically a curse word. Except it was everywhere because of TV, radio, magazines, and then eventually radio. Being a child of divorce, my levels of exposure were varied depending on whose home I was in. Dad had porno magazines strewn about the house. Mom had a new boyfriend every few months. Visiting the grandparents you would think sex didn’t exist.
But there was one commonality I have worked years to unlearn and that is that a woman is expected to behave a certain way and a man another. A woman cannot sleep around or she’s a tramp, slut, whore, etc. A man had to only be attracted to women or he was a queer, faggot, etc. There was never any room for the in between.
Exccpet when I played with my dolls at home I found myself having two Barbies kissing each other. I never wanted to be the wife with babies when my cousins and I would play house. But no, I am not a lesbian. As a matter of fact I primarily like men, thank you very much.
As I grew older and my hormones went haywire, I found I was attracted to both guys and girls. However, my attraction to girls could not be expressed because I wouldn’t want to be labeled as a lesbian. Oh the horror and shame I would bring my family! Another atrocious quandary I found myself in was that I am a highly-sexed woman and would make my boyfriend feel inferior because he couldn’t keep up. Which led me to discovering the wonderful world of sex toys.
I requested a catalog be sent to my home becoming extremely diligent in being the one to check the mail every day. I studied every toy, reading the descriptions for every porno, wondering what I would look like in the different lingerie. It opened up a whole new world for me.
Since my early teen years I have found that sex is one thing I am fairly good at. I’m good at giving advice about sex and am not judgemental about other peoples’ sexual interests. I have always enjoyed learning and teaching new ways when it comes to sex.
With this blog, I hope to share ideas, stories, sex product reviews, and hopefully open a few doors for people who feel trapped or confused.